Need a Personal Invitation for a Party?

Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
I have a group of friends who know one another because our daughters are in cheerleading together. One of the friends is having a birthday, so a mom in the group put together a happy hour to celebrate, and sent an email about it to our cheer mom’s group. I then mentioned the party to one of the birthday girl’s closest friends, and invited her to come. She is refusing because she did not receive a personal invitation from the organizer. I think she is being silly because I know the party organizer likes her, knows how close she and the birthday girl are, and would not mind her attending the party. Also, it is not like it is some formal affair! It is simply a happy hour for a friend’s birthday. The only reason she was not on the list is because she is not on our cheerleading email group. Don’t you think she is being ridiculous?

Dear N.S.,
I hate to disagree with you, but I think this friend is correct in not wanting to attend without an invitation from the official hostess of the party. I would feel uncomfortable attending a party in this situation too. As she walks in, she will feel like she needs to give an explanation to the hostess of why she is there. If you really want this lady to attend, I would ask the hostess of the party to send her an email with an invitation and the details of the party.