Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
I have a friend who is very kind and giving, and will do anything for me whenever I need her. She will pick up my children if I am unable to, and pick something up at the store if I am sick or in need. The issue I have with her is that she will not let me reciprocate. It then makes me feel uncomfortable, because I think the friendship is lopsided. Do you think I am being silly? I want to say something to her, but I am not sure what to say. Thank you.
G.P.
Dear G.P.,
I do not think that you are being silly at all. I understand where you are coming from. People like helping out their friends, and when a relationship is always one sided (in any way) it makes one or both parties uncomfortable. Next time you offer to do something for your friend, and she refuses your help, this is your chance to address the issue. Explain to her how much you appreciate what she does for you, and that you enjoy doing favors for others as much as she does. Tell her that she is depriving you of feeling good about yourself. Tell her the next favor you want from her is for you to be able to do something nice for her.