Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
My husband and I were invited to a friend’s house for brunch on Easter Sunday. About two weeks before the event, the friend asked if I minded bringing a vegetable dish or two. I said of course I would be glad to, and asked her how many were coming. She said 23 people would be attending, and that she was asking everyone to bring something. I typically ask if I can bring something whenever I am invited to a dinner or a party at someone’s house, but thought this was a bit much because of the number of people coming, and the significance of the request. (Also, it was not because of a financial burden. She always has servers at her house when she throws a party.) Do you think a request like this is reasonable and typical?
I do not think that inviting someone to a party, and then giving them an assignment of what to bring so that it serves 23 people is reasonable or typical. If she had said that she is having a “pot-luck dinner,” then her request would have been expected. However, inviting people over for an Easter Sunday brunch – with servers – is far from a “pot-luck dinner.” It sounds like a party that you wear your nice church clothes, and bring something to give to the hostess (such as flowers or champagne) in appreciation of the invitation. Your friend needs to rethink how she hosts parties, and be more upfront at the onset when she invites people into her home for a party.