Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
A few years ago, my brother reconnected, and now is married to his high school sweetheart. She has been previously married, and has three amazing grown children. One is getting married later this year, and my brother mentioned that he is concerned about the expense of the wedding. His wife’s former husband does very well, and can afford to pay for the wedding. However, his stepdaughter mentioned that there are some things that her father may not be willing to pay for, so my brother is thinking he will have to pick up the rest of the expenses. Do you think he is obligated to do this? Thank you.
N.S.
Dear N.S.,
The original tradition for weddings is that the bride’s family pays for the wedding, and for the transportation and lodging of all guests. The groom’s family is responsible for the rehearsal dinner, and the honeymoon. Modern times brings modern finances, and we all know that many brides and grooms pay for a lot, or all, of their wedding, rehearsal dinner, and honeymoon. It sounds like the bride needs her father and mother need to sit her down and give her a budget for the wedding. If your brother (the step-father) thinks the budget is unreasonably low, and is able to comfortably pay for part of the wedding, then this is a wonderful gesture. If this is a case of the bride being demanding, then I do not think your brother should feel obligated to pay for any of the wedding.